Rattails

Yo, who the heck decided it was a good idea to grow a rattail? Seriously folks, who thought that grooming your head 95% of the way around but then growing a 1-inch wide strip of hair 2 feet long down the middle of your back was attractive? I must admit, the description itself is apt, for as soon as you see that nappy hair trailing off down the spine you immediately think rodent. The real question is: What message are you trying to send? Is it: "Oh hey everybody, I'm a member of the social class that likes to swill Iron City Lite and wear stonewashed, cutoff denim vests while talking about the value of owning a ATV." I firmly believe that presentation says something about you. A tongue stud sends a message, as does a downward spiralling tattoo on the lower back, visible under the belly shirt with "Flirt" printed on it. I'll tell you right now, if my significant other, child, or brother had a rattail growing out the back of their dumb skull I'd be grabbing my Fiskars faster than you can say NASCAR.